السبت، 2 مايو 2009

Natalia

I spent the weekend with;

Natalia!?

I appeared to her, I had watched her sleep, the first time I ever looked at anyone sleep, and I told her;

In a red shirt...

We've met, three, to four times...

I told her so, that;

She and her baby give me gentle light...

I say;

You are ugly...

I stayed in the bunkbed, she spent all night with me, until dawn...

I call her too many moles...You are ugly.

She ripped the one on my face, clean off...

I talked Devendra...

She heard me muttering about true love, she was shocked, she began to talk about him...

I groaned and turned over to sleep, I didn't want to listen, so I didn't...

When my sister wondered that, she heard Hathaway, because I was riding through the streets...

she rubbed my chin, and said

Kings have beards

I moaned...he looks Kings...somehitng something

When I was pregnant with ELMA, she appeared, Natalia just suddenly appeared and she talked to the baby for two hours, making him a King...the egg went to Heaven...he's the guy!!

Polly appeared, and grabbed my chin in her hands; told me the Gig in New York...

And the japanese were crazy!! And when John played, he popped, and I called him a Lemon!!!

I moaned, I didn't find that funny, so I told her to go; the new album is awful, and I have the right to be pissed...

I went down-stairs to sleep on the sofa; Natalia appeared, rubbing her teeth with her finger, and waving her arms, I couldnt hear her;

@Yes!! I rub my teeth in the mirror when I mocking someone, go away!!@

I cuddled my schoolfriend, she got braindamage when she fell off her bicycle, we had a fight one day, I kept kicking her, we were both being beaten by our parents, and my way to deal with that was to pick fights, because she had slapped a ketchup burger in my face, and took a picture; because;

'her head is too big';

I cried all night...

I cried the next day

and the next

I hadn't seen her for months before it happened, I'd gone to the swots, and she was the freaks, to the swots, because my marks were jumping erractilly from A's slivering down to E and F's...and before that I was in the Tarts, who gave me the damn mad idea of shaving my legs at 11, walking downstairs with deep cuts, bleeding and bleeding, then mum went nutty...and the clever clowns gave me respect, the ones the swots called the bimbo's because the teacher were putting me in tears and detention, all the time;

And so my school-girl came back after a year, and when it happened I thought no one cared, and that no-one prayed, and I prayed the night i heard of the accident, and prayed with gold light, to heal, her...and I talked to her at night, for yes, about a week-without calling;

And when she returned, she couldn't talk well, and the maths teacher was still a very upset former bullying dog, and I saw her smiling when I looked (ook, because I gave her bed!! eek-because I discovered that she was thinking of me-she put in nan when she was a swine-'you stupid!' and her mum said sick things and nan would repeat odd words, perhaps nan had been dead for some years-)_and she made it to college, but

this is like a dream;

boys in sports clothing, and horrible girls began shouting and mocking her, in the corridor, and I span out of a room like magic, and I was the only witness, so I shocked them, I shouted at them and said; BEHOLD GOD!! SHE IS WISE, THOU ART A DOGand then lost her, she sings;

"trembling midnight lands
and going to bed with the wizard"

"She write lovers in my head"
Bat for Lashes, first album

During that week my tooth, killed and killed

I said I had to keep to her soul, because that took away the pain...I told her what happened to my brains, that they burnt and shook, for a week, in bed, I could feel my brains moving under my skull, and I couldn't tell anyone, but eventually got through to the jewish girls...

and i did;

Mental Hospital, March, last year;

I was called, and I saw, light sabres flashing in the air, that red demon with the nobs on his head, appeared, he cut off my little toe...I was laying in bed, Hans and Luke, well, two men, were struggling, I called the sabre to my hand, it was easy, I cut him in half...

I got up to walk to the sink, and, the mirror...there was a flash of light, and, Two men fell out of my soul, one;

Hans;

Had a huge head, with short dark red hair, and a roundface;

the other;

Had a skeletal bonestructure, and long blonde hair...

When they got back, they became me again.

So Natalia left me, and I took my schoolfriend to Jamaica, I said you won't like Africa, and I will have to translate, I predicted men taking us to a bar, I said, I would hate the seedy bar, and the dancing...

our babies hate her Mother, because she is so sick;

And appeared to cry;

You dont love Mummy, you love Nanny!!

I dont know why they said that, perhaps they heard me walking around, praying and trying to pacify her, because she was sick...they have such cute voices, because we are both local, the other kids are well spoken, I watched her in soul, and thought about Heaven...

I spent one week with her and left, I think thats fine...how can that be fine??

When my sister and I were called, we were well, they said;

Do you fly??

We said;

Yes! We fly!!

they said;

we need the power of hell!

Hell wil die!!

Help us men are crying we will die!! They are the evil empire!!

We were trained to the sword, the year before Rohan, my sister, had a perceptive sight, and she could feel deadlier...

Using the Force...

here its possible, but there is a little guard

Use the Voice...

I jumped up and forward a few inches outside the pub...bit tired trying to think about this, so I'll give it another chance

الخميس، 30 أبريل 2009

الاثنين، 20 أبريل 2009

Dalon Head

The dentist is rolling around above my bed at night...I'm full of cotton so I can only growl;

"This is black magic!! It's not you!"

She stays...rolling

"This is white magic!! It can't be you!! This isn't the dentist!!"

She's talking...

"Miss!! I can't kiss you! You know my mouth is bleeding..."

Then she sees a girl in the corner of the room, and laughs, and says;

"Oh God, you want too!"

I can't hear;

"Miss, this is my 'sister' she prays for me to keep the demon men away!"...I tell the dentist to leave...then I cuddle the 'sister'...and then fall asleep..."You little dallon...you don't know why I call to bed...I call you to bed, because you are sweet and I am sick...little dalon head...I look at you and bed...dallon head...dalon is bed..."

At the dentists, (at the dentist's is an amazing booklet about Islam, about tkaing part in charities...);

I'm having a rotten tooth at the back of my mouth removed, drilled and pulled...I'm predicting something embarrassing, so I place my hands over my trouser fly, I say whats embarrassing...she has chestnut hair, smooth white skin and big brown eyes, she is either Irish or American...I keep my eyes shut...

An angel appears, in silver, and jumps on my groin...as I am being injected for the pain;

"Bonk!!" I say out loud, in between the groaning, then in what I believe is another language, perhaps hebrew, maybe gaelic;

("No! no! I mean, she did this at the hairdressers too! I don't want BONK!!")

"Bonk!"

My groin, is, chirping, like a bird...I think they can't hear it...a singing bird...like little whistles, I'm nooot hot...

Just before I go into a light sleep, I feel her belly against, my head...stupidly, I sweep my forehead over her belly...I say, you didn't notice...

"SHIT!!"

She did and laughed, she is secretly crying I'm bed...She says;

"You want..."

Then I open my eyes, I look into her, I see a green light...I say out loud;

"That means true love!! Shit!" I close them, and she sees light green and white paint over my eyes, like a Hindu goddesses, paint...I walk out without looking back...

"This true love is dead, because you're miss..."

At Rehab, I dated the Arabian doctor, once she said to me;

"You tell me you love my Koran, but you are too thin, Koran men are fat..."

This should make 'em proud...

الجمعة، 17 أبريل 2009

Films

you are lucky

she looks groovy

you are 98

sell twenty

dark eyebrows

couldnt keep the tooth

she cuddles

you paint

get famous

pay her thousands

she is sweet!

you make it

you dont make it

father

-

she has a flat like a hat!

why do you cry I pulled out your own brains on brighton pier

got stuck

she sleeps

she cuddles

where are you?

you are upon street fuddles, this means you sleep for weeks and she carts rent money and you sleep and she hits the canvas and she says you see vices and she cuddles and you rest mondays and she carts money and you heat sunday and she will relax and you have every sunday because you see monday, and she is tall like sunday and her flat is small, and she says see what we can witch, and the gallery says "I see Monday!!" so she sleeps because you're selling, and so she speaks, at the cart monday, the exhibition went through monday, to sunday, sleeep, because hope from motorway to city, is like dying sleepily, hoping and hoping, just, so much, that you need to stop hoping, like having a real heartache in the face!! like see-ing you have died, like wanting and wanting. because she prays for you...

--

stupid.

I'm famous in American Heaven. I have released two films.

I love "Dem." (Dem Aliens!!) Twentyfive Mohammedan brothers buy tickets to Dem's World Premiere, hoping to see another political film by GABRIEL...(the first film: Set in Northern England council estates involving Muslims, plus, an American Jewish guy in New York...with the Orthodox gang crying for Palestine...it was researched and is poetical...

Dem opens with my sister-character and mum and me, in a shopping centre...cuts to Dad and me in a car in a dark car park...I'm eating a sausage roll and hearing my wife cry I am too goy...then;

An armoured car appears round the corner (this film only survives on my dad and sister) and knocks off our car door...we are Eastside...

"Get in!!" Dad spins the car...Dad has this hideous crik in his neck which he snaps while driving..Dad doesn't swear, he wears chinos and cheap fleeces...a spaceship appears: Dad;

"Blady 'Ell!!! MANNNNN?? SHEETTT???!!!"

Sister is a loon, she squeals a lot;

"Wheeeeeeeeelllllll!! Wha!!" The Alien is there, so, she 'texts her boyfriend for help' Then they stop at a pub, as though nothing is happening while my character is crying we are dead, and calling for help...she makes jokes about priscilla,...

The audience in the cinema cries; Call the Police!!!...a muslim laughs, it is implied that the police are pigs..."Oi!!!"

man shit if the future is dead, dreaming of the future makes me feel sick. You were with me at the premiere...wooh.

الثلاثاء، 14 أبريل 2009

Mystery Girl

I can see she has eyes and I can see she has hair, but I don't know who she is... she has long hair and dark eyes...she is my pelvis nuts, but I have had no idea who she is...she appears randomly, to call me german bitch, to make my pelvis dance...she's got gold hair...it's the rock music from our souls again.

last night, I worked out who she is.

I had imagined 'Mary' to look like an English woman, like, I must be absolute respect. Like a tall woman, like white, full of solicitude, all prayers and whiteness, but this woman is driving me insane. I wanted to find; "Mummy Mary." I wanted to talk with her while I shopped, I sent her silver and diamond bangels and earrings...but I got the wrong woman.

Bang!! I've entered Time!

Bar Mitzvah.

A tiny beautiful girl is there, dancing in the middle of the room, with her feet splayed, doing this odd little African dance, of kill the white man...and says accusingly to those present; "God is my Lover!!"

So, this is the beginning of the killing. Look at this!! Why do you have to do this??!!

I sit in the garden for ten minutes, bowing up and down;

"Thank you, Yahweh, thank you Yahweh..."

Then I'm back walking around the house, my legs tapping uncontrollably, my hips wiggling...

And I want to cry and cry. Laugh and then laugh...

That Bar Mitzvah, dammit...##we are both insane...

29 AD:

We were fine. Then Yeshua said;

"I've called the devil."

My angel-wings turned bright red...stupid bastard!!

We told him to leave. He left.

He went wandering...He found a cave, he ate 17 women, then he drank a mane. I appeared from rehab, I wanted bed. I loved him, so I waited for the bed. That weird woman I made appeared, she kept talking insanely in his head, he kept giggling...I told her to go. I said, there are drugs in the locusts, eat the locusts. I killed the devil. We didn't bed.

His friends were devils. Gabrielle was a silly cow. Like; "A Golden Cow." She said; "I am Yahweh, and you, are bent!"

I hated Judas. I said; "This bastard will kill us!! Don't you understand he is bent??!! He said I am black Miss!!! He says; (in whispers)'You're sexually shit...' (!!))"

Zarathustra carries the corpse for miles. Judas is the corpse.

Yeshua said; "Dad...we've gathered men..." He gathered Lunatics...a down-going.

I heard; "We're shit." They said; "We are going to fight for God."

When I said I had killed the devil, he laughed..."Killing this devil is shit!! Why did we kill it?? We wanted it to heat!!"

I hated all of them, thrice, so I denied them, I hate boys, thrice, and left, so I died, I didn't take that holiday to greece...thus goeth he willingly over the
bridge.

The Holiday in Greece:

My Big Fat Greek Wedding.

They make me marry Gomez...but I hear;

Luigi 'Gabriel' Amaros has married -/-A girl.

It's my family. Gomez is the apple because he is queer, and the oranges are lesbians. I was fifteen and they make me get married to a man.

Mum beats Mannie, she bites me!! She goes absolutely insane, and pulls her hair and drags her across floors...running away from Mum is a routine game.

23 AD.

----

الخميس، 9 أبريل 2009

Alfred

Dad is ---what?---I'm hating him. This is just a stupid day, from yesterday;

Dad grabs my little brother, round the neck, and brother is whimpering like a dog, I can hear Grandad's voice in my Dad, telling my brother;

"Son! We've got a hit!" I can see Dad, about to punch little brother, he is holding a fist up against his face, it's a terrible feeling see-ing violence, I kick Dad, to break his leg...the dog is called Alfred...and he says: "Say we are West Country!" I'm hating Dad.

Earlier; 'Look at Dad!! He is a pig or a stupid man, he gets violent! Look at Dad! Then he sits by the pond talking to God...I've written a play, about Dad...I'm sorry...it makes men cry...

I'm in the car thinking of this speech and then think of my father's side, hoping they are well, and aunty, how well my father's side of the family is, if she is well, that I think in the german language, and when I speak german, I say, well...I'm trying to tell you, my thoughts are germna, and I think these thoughts are much more God, than Im regular speaking in english, which i'm getting slower in!!..But really it's pompous?? @Look at these dogs!! We rule!! I don't car for dogs!!" Nan loved aunty and aunty is supposed to be sweet, a remember a school picture, she has long red hair in braids and a huge nose, a saxonite!! nan used to mix up our names...why am I hating Dad, Nan still cries; "My little son is dead!!"

, look at Grandad!! King!!! Blood: Little sister, uses the same cupboard for a drink after me...'Check the records!', she sees in the record, "Yeah, it says Alfred!!: this:

Blood of King Alfred-of-Bavaria!of I hear around 909 AD...

I hate Dad, I want to play, the black princess/prince, "Falcon! Falcon!!! I will take the sword!! You have killed my light!!! I take out my eyes!! Heathen dogs die!!" Wearing some nitty shit, like black feathers on my shoulders, and black belts, with a small sword, waved about...He is up there crying light.

Later, Dad arrives at Nan's using a walking stick:

"My hip went...." Bang! Got his hip, I was trying to take out his knees...Dad is the 'stupid' son, why am I hating him?...what does this Dad prince see, he reads Rumi, and says it souls Heathen? Grandad was shown to me by my girl, at rehab, she showed me a film, magically in the lens of my little glasses, I see my uncle, being bathed, he has long curly blonde hair, "I am the youngest of five men...etc..."...then there is a ghostly film of me, with a little head and red hair bangs, drowning...then Grandad Alfred, mourning the death of his young wife, he wears a crown and red and gold robes, He cries the Lord; "Father!! My wife hath died!!" She is lowered into a lake, and comes back to life. You see, I think I have his God, because he speaks Kings, his is a Thou...

I'm at Nan's, looking at a picture of great-granny and grandad; I tell her; Nan looks like a mean, grumpy old woman, why are they crying we are chinese?? No!! but she is so sweet in Heaven, I see her divine, but do you know she has just fallen??, she has gone to lower 'england'!! I remember she called me in Time and She said, my daughter is Kings! So I gave her an early ticket to heaven...Grandad looks like happy light!! I hope to be like him...And my brother is lucky to have his picture near the telephone, becasue we bring him light, when we look up waiting to talk!!' and then I walk out in a low, because these words were in my head, but God had them spoken, She laughs and says; Heathen were dead...

Dad looks up at me on the stairs, with his very bright blue eyes, I reply;

"Jerry!!"

My brother walks in through the door, Dad stops him...brother stops, woofs, because he is a nutty little doggy, and cries; 'Jerry pig!!"

I'm reading on the computer next to his; "Don't fucking talk to me..."

I don't listen, he says; "Are you gay? because being a gay woman is God..."

"Leave me alone, I'm trying to learn..."
Little pigs. Drink.what i found when I searched:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alfred_the_Great

search others on google

الخميس، 2 أبريل 2009

When You Are Dead and Ark Of Covenant

When we are all dead, and mum and dad call me, wondering where I am;

"I will be higher than Lover...and I will feel every soul in death...and I will make great souls...these souls will rise for God, and they will set apart the men...they will be beautiful...I will live in white...Abraham will be my Queen...I will sleep for Nigh Time...when I hear them I will become High...I will let them know I am High...I will enter a door higher than dove...I will bring four women with me, they will be like manna unto God, like succor unto wealth, honey and milk of my Bride...I will keep Heavenly God, I will be meek...I will fly a dove to God...I will sleep 49 days, and then arise unto God...I will see women like dove...I will forever Love..."

The Infidel hath No Time, they burn the Bride, I will fly Time, every death soul shall sink...they will become like as to waste, they will perish...when I call Him, they burn...their death needs haste...lay them to waste...become as to God, and lay the Infidel to waste...their time hath come...I count the men to naught...I hath brought God, they will perish...become Truth...they knock on the door, I won't...Yay, have the Infidel killed!!

When I looked upon this Ark, I saw it was unclean...I was dead...it was grey, the colour of dark hell, I looked at it and said; Love/Clean...I felt fine!!! So much happier, fuller...it doesn't last long...the Angels had moved, they were both facing me...men tried to look, men defied, they went blind...I can expect two kisses before sunday...ON monday I can expect Love...on tuesday, a fluerp...wednesday will be mixed blood...a whole night of snogs...

"The Ark hath power...Gabriel sails on Love...her power is slightly brought upon men...she needs FRUM...the Ark hath cried her Love...it will happen and we will die...these girls want to marry God, treble god...Paradise will be shown...hell hath moan...Let Gabriel go...the Ark has cried a seed of love...this will be love...she gets one kiss...the men yay went blind, they were power overcome...they hit paradise...I have them died...Gabriel looks and Gods...she will have the wine...she will expect gods...women must welcome her...men must still be god...we thank her...the infidels have burned...

YOU SEEK ME IN COVENANT, AND YOU WILL BE DEAD, YOU WILL BURN, YOU WILL SUFFER, YOU WILL BE MEEK UNTO GOD...YOU WILL SEE WE ARE HIGHER...MY WOMEN HATH LOVE, GABRIELLA IS QUEEN...SHE WILL PERFECT LOVE...SHE WILL DIE AND SHE WILL MOAN, BECAUSE I WANT HER IN LOVE...SHE IS VICE DEAD...OVER COME MEN WITH LOVE...THE LOVE HATH HIGHER...TWO WOMEN LOVE, TWO WOMEN HOLD THE ARK, THEIR LOVE IS HIGHER, MEN HATH DEFILED THE ARK!...THEY WILL BURN IN ETERNAL TORMENT!! GABRIEL BECOME!! TELL HER YOU LOVE! GABRIEL CAN BECOME IN HIGHER...I WILL GIVE HER LOVE...THEY TOOK YOU, THEY HATH DIED!!"