Lars Shalom

Lars Shalom fought the angels...Time for Anoushka is mine, She must have long chestnut hair. If she is Russian, what an accent!


...you fought them for Law. They were lighting Law like Haven, but they wanted Free. They wondered the line, "make her free." She is a special present. The tears are back...I spent cuddling, crying, hearing a gang from Satan, and crying, having Hell visions, waiting for no one, to get them out of my mind...Crying beside, crying in the garden.

I hit bad, and we turned...I was why first, my eyes turned dark brown, then her lover was why, and why is the colour of jewish eyes, soul eyes...then I hit, and she was why...

theres two new colours now, and raspberry's been hanging around...I didnt study the colours, raspberry, and a light, white green...I saw them kill her.

I couldn't see her face, I held her and told jewish..."I should just touch your hand. I've taken everything. This is a jewish story...if I put my hand on your leg, we've used everything up, the romance, I have to go backwards. It's not nice to hold you there." The pillow was in my arms, I brushed her neck with my lips...something became so fast, the premonition was idiotic, I was on a garden chair, rolling my head around. They killed her in my arms, they sent a sword through her neck, and made vampiric voices...I couldn't want to mourn again, so I asked Mum to check her room...I couldn't be well, to just lye there, look I went into the garden and lit up...I came back. I hate the silly, and I kept crying 'thick, thick...'

"There's something mad in you, it makes me nuts." It's silly squealing. It's lying that you're gay.

"There are no woman left, gay women do not exist, I am alone, and I want marriage, no one is a lesbian..."

"Oh, she's pretty!"

I can't stand that talk, I walk around quietly screaming. Then to remember, 'this red talk, get me out of red.' I have to remember her past. I have to remember when I liked sweet...she keeps saying somethings red.

"It's you, this stupid acting, this red in you, you mean, I mean, you know this... it's just, this; "it's all hot." I am hating girls."

My girl has been swiftly beheaded, and no-one will help. "I think you should all just fall to hell...i'll do it...I'll fall you."

This colour that got in her souls, it was the sickness. It's a light glassy blue, that says 'damned now' it's like old women's eyes, almost dead. Then I've made her feel dark brown ("Father Father, we have death, we have death, every man is hate...") But she is also dark-green, could that be a lie, I start crying quietly again...dark green = true love.

Thats odd isnt it?? IS that the lie?

"If she already knows me, or waits for me, she is already praying for me? I wonder what she likes to draw? Do I pray to keep her well? My prayers are a curse..."

They say my praying is "Pagan!" click fingers shout die, lye there and think numb. It takes one person to pray someone.

I decided to have one day with her then leave. I wanted to remember a time, when she was a small lover. We were bright, and clean. We were lighter...sweeter...careful...good...clever...she was tiny.

Then something tells me her lover is she-witch. Nope. She's upset and sweet. She just looks man-like. short hair, a face that looks?? she's getting bigger and bigger!! I got a watch in silver, hanging from a chain...It's disgraceful, it's nuts!!! It's that nutty path she takes in her life, to what?? fight?? die??? A dark-haired girl with a woman-man.

Keep me away from Anoushka, I'm too frightening, wait until we meet. Sure everything will give me sweet-stuff.

They showed me sick, bed...I dont know how. I thought she was dead. I thought, I'll clasp her neck in my hands, where the blood is...the walls covered in spurts of blood. It's dishonourable to lye in bed, with no head, the body must still be in movement.

Then I told her, my tears, why I was crying...and dark brown. I made her unwell.

I was nearly sleeping...so, well...some creep was crying;

"Tell me the future of Man!"

"I hate man-kind..."

I see a white static image of her on the edge of the bed...

"I see my girl...future...thank you..."

The relationship has lasted a whole day, and I'm off to sleep...

"Wife wife, Heaven, marriage..."

She is in black, sleeping a mile away from me on the other side of the bed, she says wife...she said that when I was making coffee in the kitchen, my head hit the sideboard...I don't believe in marriage;

"It cant be wife...I'm too deadddddddddDD!!!!!!!! FOR HIM!!!!!!! Tell me Wife!!"

I waited on the sofa, half way through the relationship, yesterday...thats when I remember..then there's the boy she was with...then there's redemption...I say to the ceiling-angels;

"Keep Aneshka, well, we need light...oh my, you are Angel, too...Anoushka the University...it's gone, I don't know..."

All day Satan men are crowding me, so I just silently sleep...I remember the bad job, the sick men in the care-home, how she has to see bad illnesses, wake up early to get to work...where she is from me, three streets away...

"NO future...then...no..."